Ken Needs a Hug and Some New Windchimes

Comment by Tina (Guest)

Tina (Guest) — Fri, 12 May 2006 16:21:09 +0000

Tina needs to be stripped naked, chained to the floor, and have her head dunked in ice cold water as she is raped from behind. :)

It even included the smiley face. Wow.

Comment by The Darkness (Guest)

The Darkness (Guest) — Mon, 17 Oct 2005 07:55:57 +0000

Paul Needs Free Music Downloads
Paul Needs (a) Welsh Musician and Songwriter
Paul needs a haircut!
Paul needs a sound system that is appropriate for the room
Paul needs your support!
Paul Needs Specs!
All Paul needs is Love
^-- Paul needs volunteers every day
^-- Paul needs more education

And of course:
Paul needs to go to the bathroom

Comment by Timothy Ross (Guest)

Timothy Ross (Guest) — Sat, 15 Oct 2005 18:10:21 +0000

First hit:

Tim needs your help. Will sell wife for food

The second hit was a blog where another tim was playing this same game
and listing his results.

Comment by Cori (Guest)

Cori (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 16:40:05 +0000

With peers, Cori needs instruction, modeling, and reinforcement regarding appropriate personal boundaries and social behavior norms.
CORI needs to be fixed.
Gloss uses Dfi,t (number of documents in node i with term t) and SumWi, sum of the local weights for term t at node i) while Cori needs only Dfi,t.
CORI needs to strategize.
Cori needs to eat 1 banana for each mile she travels.
yep, Cori needs a good smackin'.
The Board of CORI reserves the right to make changes to these policies in the cases where CORI needs to improve adherence to legislation,
Cori needs your help to win this major international online competition, she cannot do this without you.

Comment by Bake Town (Guest)

Bake Town (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 15:32:02 +0000

It didn't work wiht my name. What gives?

Comment by Donna (Guest)

Donna (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 14:58:13 +0000

Mostly I needed prayers and help but also:

Donna needs a calm, cat-free, dog-free, small-child free home where she can spend
her twilight years in a peaceful and caring environment.

Donna needs to find a boyfriend so her acidic mother Flo won't think she is gay, celibate or repellant to men.

Comment by LizD (Guest)

LizD (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 13:38:04 +0000

oh dear...

Liz needs a man
Liz needs protection (see above)
Liz needs a catchy slogan
Liz needs one more taste of her oozing pastry (eeeww!)
Liz needs to put a lid on it
Liz needs to be laundered (??)
Liz needs to be loved
Liz needs to satisfy... herself

yikes!

Comment by pinky (Guest)

pinky (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 13:33:11 +0000

pinky needs a prayer
pinky needs extra work
pinky needs a good home
pinky needs to play a note
pinky needs to awaken her passions
pinky needs to come clean

(although the 2nd to last would seem to lead naturally to the last)

Comment by LizD (Guest)

LizD (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 13:33:06 +0000

But Ken, if that underpants run was in San Francisco, the underpants would surely be on someone's head, not covering their 'parts.'

Comment by Noelle (Guest)

Noelle (Guest) — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 09:39:51 +0000

That company cookbook is nothing compaired to the hilarity of the Gallery of Regrettable Food http://www.lileks.com/institute/gallery/index.html

Ken Needs a Hug and Some New Windchimes

Ken — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 08:02:39 +0000

A company cookbook, a sport I could really enjoy, and a list of things I need.