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<< Previous: Catching Up, Part 1 | Next: Catching Up, Part 3 >>

Catching Up, Part 2
Monday, 2006 January 30 - 10:28 pm
Coulter assbaggery; Hamas and Pita; the upcoming Iran War; Rice and Beans; the State of the Union (drinking game!).

New political assbaggery! This is from our old reliable source, Ann Coulter. She joked that we should poison Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens, for his liberal voting history. "We need somebody to put rat poisoning in Justice Stevens' creme brulee," Coulter said. "That's just a joke, for you in the media."

It is oh so tempting to make a joke about things we should do to Ann Coulter, but I'm going to take the high ground here.

So Hamas has won the elections in Palestine. This is nothing but bad news, I think. The Western world will cut off funding to the Palestinian Authority, and that will raise tensions in the Middle East. Hamas has an opportunity to advance the peace process, but they won't, because they are a radical right-wing party. And we all know what radical right-wing parties can do.

And to think, Hamas tastes so good on pita bread. Oh wait, I'm thinking of hummus. (Amy and I have been working on a good hummus recipe, by the way... stay tuned for that.)

Does anyone else find it troubling how many right-wing parties are winning elections around the world? Even Canada elected a conservative government, for cryin' out loud. And with all the right-wing victories, we get more nationalism, more isolationism, more war-mongering, and more religious huffing and puffing. This bodes not well for world peace, I think.

And speaking of huffing, Bush is warning the Iranian people that they want to have greater freedom... the same way the Iraqis "wanted" freedom bombed into them, I suppose. "We want the people of Iran to be able to live in a free society," said Bush. "Even if we have to kill every last one of those brown bastards to accomplish that." (Okay, so I embellished that a little.)

The only question I have is, which U.S. election will Bush try to influence by invading Iran?

Condoleeza Rice has been active lately, speaking up about Hamas and various other topics. I don't really have that much interesting to say about her, except that I love the fact that the AP chooses to use this picture in every news story about her:

"More beans, Miss Rice?" I'd say she's had enough.

The State of the Union address is tomorrow. (I love this story about it.) That means it's time for the State of the Union Drinking Game. Every time you hear one of these words or phrases, you must take a drink:

- "Up or down vote"
- "Judicial activism"
- "Tax cuts" (an an extra drink if he talks about how they're "working")
- "Small business"
- "American people"
- "Iraqi people"
- "Iranian people"
- "Brave men and women"
- "War on terror"
- "Making progress" (or, "Hard work"... drink three times if both phrases are uttered in the same breath)
- "Freedom" (and an extra drink if he's talking about Iranians)
- "Prescription drug benefits"
- "Health savings plan"
- "Clean coal" (and three drinks if mentioned in the same breath as "hydrogen")
- "Nu-cu-lar" - finish your drink
Permalink  33 Comment   Bookmark and Share
Posted by Ken in: politics


Comment #1 from Crouching Hamster (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 3:33 am : #
Nice post!
I'll be playing the game.
Comment #2 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:19 pm : #
Dennis Hastert lives in a VAN DOWN BY THE RIVER.

Dang, I should have put Coretta Scott King on the list.
Comment #3 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:21 pm : #
"Freedom" in the first minute! Drink!

And there it is again! And again!
Comment #4 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:22 pm : #
AND he's said it in reference to Iranians!
Comment #5 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:24 pm : #
Dang, the word "freedom" alone is going to make us drunk.
Comment #6 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:26 pm : #
I just saw Dick chug a baby
Comment #7 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:28 pm : #
They did not make enough vodka for this show...
Comment #8 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:30 pm : #
Ugh, look at him mention the American military to pick up cheap applause. LOOK AT HIM SMIRKING.
Comment #9 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:35 pm : #
Hastert IS Porky
Comment #10 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:35 pm : #
Comment #11 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:37 pm : #
ooohhh Nu Cu Lar!! Shit I have to finish my dang drink, Cheney downed another baby.
Comment #12 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:40 pm : #
OMG, look at one side of the aisle applauding the Patriot Act. And hey, here he goes about his illegal wiretapping.
Comment #13 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:41 pm : #
Patriot Act = ASSBAGGERY
Comment #14 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:45 pm : #
They should fear Cheney!! he ate a baby!
Comment #15 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:45 pm : #
Comment #16 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:47 pm : #
gddgccGhgxxcnbZ n s74rt785rv 8 r r ra6 You are touching my nipple KEN!!
Comment #17 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:48 pm : #
Hillary said, "I saw Cheney eating a baby"
Comment #18 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:49 pm : #
Sheesh, he's trying to push the Social Security thing again. Hey, if you didn't ask for that PRIVATIZATION thing, that might have happened LAST year. Partisanship? That's YOU, George.
Comment #19 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:50 pm : #
Comment #20 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:52 pm : #
Here it comes...

Here it comes...

"health savings plan" AND "small business"! Make it a double!
Comment #21 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:52 pm : #
Medi Who?? Americans grow dope. But not like the Columbians. Look at the monkey. (Cheney ate 3 more babies!)
Comment #22 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:53 pm : #
Oh, oh, oh....

"Clean Coal", AND NU-CU-LAR!!!
Comment #23 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:54 pm : #
Wait, we're gonna run our cars on wood?

Got any wood?
Comment #24 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:55 pm : #
So I started "Pre Drinking" I still did not consume any babies during the making of this State Of The Union Address. Did he just say Corn Liquor?
Comment #25 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:56 pm : #
He wants to ground our children?
Comment #26 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 9:57 pm : #
Comment #27 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 10:00 pm : #
He said "activist courts". That's close enough to "judicial activism". And did he say our children need direction in love?
Comment #28 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 10:02 pm : #
I am no longer responsible for whatever Amy says...
Comment #29 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 10:03 pm : #
I am de-runk hear me snore....... We need to snow babies that Cheney does not eat with love, on Girls Gone Wild videos VIA the Bush Twins
Comment #30 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 10:06 pm : #
good times...good times. My brother should be home from Af-turd-stant-inople soon. God I hope. I think I have reason to bitch, I voted AND have to live with the outcome.
Comment #31 from Ken (realkato)
2006 Jan 31 - 10:08 pm : #
Wow, this speech is much worse than I even imagined it could have been... and we are getting far drunker than I thought we would.
Comment #32 from Amy (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 10:17 pm : #
Bush will poop out the babies Cheney has eaten, and we will adopt them and love them! uuuurp!
Comment #33 from MonoCerdo (Guest)
2006 Jan 31 - 11:13 pm : #
Ok, I was in my car driving home from teaching my class when this started, but I made a mental tally & saved up all my drinks for when I got home and HOLLLY FKUSCING sHYET!!!

Comments are closed for this post.

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